Ever wonder why kids do not listen to you? Do you have to repeat instructions again and again? Are you getting frustrated and helpless because of this? Me too. Have you tried Positive discipline yet?
For the past few months, I have been reading various articles and books on how to get my kids to cooperate without yelling at them. What I found is the very powerful term – “Positive Parenting Skills “. I know I am not only the mother who is facing this issue, So I wanted to write something about it for other mothers too. I wanted to share a few helpful tips for every mother for positive parenting to make our life easier and stress-free.
What Is Positive Discipline?
According to experts, “Positive discipline means you respect, listen, and reward good behaviour with love”.
I found that positive parenting philosophy centers around avoiding the use of yelling and punishment to teach kids right from wrong. It focuses on respect and problem-solving skills.
Below Are The Positive Parenting Skills That I followed:
Give Clear Instructions:
You have to give clear instructions to your child like “Before you do anything else today, you need to clean your rooms”. This way, there’s no forgetting and everyone can happily go about their day once the requests have been completed.
Action Works Better Than Words:
I may tell my daughter she can only watch TV after she cleared the things that are scattered in a living room. If I look up to see she hasn’t completed my request and is happily sitting on the couch watching TV, it’s my job to make sure she does what she was asked to do. That could mean a firm reminder.
Make Them Independent:
When I’m busy in the morning, it’s much easier for me to pick out my daughter’s clothes and dress her myself even though I know she can dress up herself. I should allow her enough time to dress and learn to become proficient at a skill that’s appropriate for her age.
Stop Giving Bribes:
Some parents reward their kids for getting their homework done or getting good grades. Others bribe their kids for good behaviour at the mall or restaurants. But getting into the habit of bribing or rewarding our children in basic situations sends the message that cooperating is optional. The more we bribe them, the more our kids will expect it.
Kids need to learn internal rewards like confidence and pride, as well as social norms and family expectations. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t reward your child when they have a big accomplishment. But I am saying that you’ll want to reconsider buying your kids candy or toys every time you walk into the mall or a market to ensure their good behaviour.
Be Consistent:
This is the parenting mistake that my husband and I make the most. I am extremely strict with my kids when it comes to things like screen time, doing chores, and snacking. When your kids are getting different messages from their parents, they’re not sure which set of rules should they follow. Sit down with your spouse and talk through the most common parenting issues and challenges you face. Come up with rules that you both agree to follow.
Key Takeaways:
Hyperactive children learn differently than other children. They need to learn things the hard way – through experience. For example, if a house rule is no eating in the living room, they will need to be reminded and redirected to the kitchen many times before accepting the rule.
To conclude, I would like to say that try your best to be firm and respectful; everyone has a bad day and loses their temper, teaching your kids how to solve their problem on their own and make better decisions definitely requires some extra work on your part, but in the end, it’s totally worth it!
Image Source: https://www.pbs.org/
Janani S Koushik
Mansi Zaveri
Dr Rashmi Shetty
KSP Team
Rupal Mohta
